Jimmy Fallon

I met Jimmy Fallon today. Nice guy. Turns out he's got a couple super powers. They aren't a secret, he just doesn't talk about them unless he's asked.

Lately I've been craving a lot of fruit punch. I still am without powers. But I've been catching up on my movies.

My Pants

I was on the phone at work and eventually the phone conversation turned into chit chat with the boss. And as I was chit chatting I was kind of playing with the pen I was holding. After I put the phone down I realized I had written all over my khakis. They were nice khakis too. I hate this job. The only thing good in the vending machine is poundcake and I refuse to buy poundcake from a vending machine. I refuse. I think I need to remeasure my neck size. I've been ignoring the fact that it's not as big as I thought it was.

My source at the police department just IM'd me. Some big Octopus is walking down Madison Avenue. I'm glad my super powers aren't working. I don't know what I would do about that. I magine little old me trying to coax a giant octopus back in the water. What would I do ask him to stay off of Madison Avenue? I don't like dealing with big monsters because everyone expects them to be killed and I'm not into that.

It would be nice to get out of the office though.

Trouble

My powers don't seem to be working. I went to a therapist for super heroes. I think I would have been better off if I threw $240 down the toilet and flushed. At least I wouldn't have been subjected to bad breath and boring magazines in the waiting room. The Human Monster said the same thing happened to him, but I swear he's just trying to make me feel better.

I've got to get my powers back. i've got to snap together. I've got to get a temp job that has health insurance.